Right. So. Both boys are walking. Our lives have changed. They both also somehow seem to have the energy of a swarm of chattering monkeys. Both of them. So, like, two whole swarms of chattering monkeys in our house, all the time. Thousands of monkeys. Everywhere. All the time. In just two little boys. I […]
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Last update: December 30th, 2013 at 08:54 am
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Coconut Macaroons. Gorgeous, right? I tried to make some. Image credit: Sweet & Saucy So my holiday preparations are going awesome. You?
You hear parents say that, right? My baby just loooves books! All breezy and casual. I sometimes hear a parent tip a conversation about babies or kids into a conversation about books, and how much their kid looooves books. I’ll listen for a while, and I’ll nod and smile. But depending on the intensity or […
I am enjoying the chillier weather because we were able to break out the bunny suits. I guess these are dinosaur suits. Really, Ma? Really? Yes. I am cute. But you are ridiculous. Can we just go and get this over with?
It’s autumn. I get it. Trees, leaves, wind, decorative motherfucking gourds, all that. I like autumn. I do. I like leaves, too! They’re pretty as hell this time of year, and they’ve been exceptionally pretty this season. I’ve loved taking the boys for walks and pointing out all the different colors.
So, I hate sweating. Sweating, as in the moisture one creates while exerting oneself. On those extra warm days we had in the summer, I hesitated to go out because, you know, it was WARM. And SUNNY. And the possibility of breaking a sweat grossed me out. No thank you, beautiful summer day. I’m going […]
We’ve taken the boys on two trips involving airplanes. Both times, the anticipation of chaos, gnashing of teeth and full-on armageddon made travel stressful. Dave hates air travel even without babies. So with our twin boys, plus Dave, I clenched my jaw and tried to remain the only sane person in the world. THE WHOLE [
Our guys are fifteen months old. They are spastic little imps. That phrase popped out of my mouth recently. Someone asked me how the boys were doing and that is what I blurted out. “They are spastic little imps.” They have been screaming lately. Babies like to yell, right? They are testing their voices, making [
The guys love the swings. They LOVE the swings. The swings. They love them. There are a couple parks in our neighborhood that have baby swings. These are public parks and they are lovely. The weather in Portland usually turns chilly and dank by October. But we’ve had sunny, gorgeous weather this month. It’s been
I little while ago, I complained about cookies. But I also talked about how I like to cook, and I feel like I’ve gotten more skilled in the kitchen as I’ve gotten older. Don’t get me wrong, though. My favorite go-to lunch is still a box of Annie’s Shells and Cheddar with some extra cheese […]
In the 1990s, when I was in college and waiting tables, I screwed around with my hair quite a lot. It was almost always short, so it seemed pretty low investment if something went tragic with the science experiments I performed on my head. I look back wistfully, and with a little sting of embarrassment, […]
I love to bake. That may be the most predictable statement ever from a woman, who is a mom, who is home with kids, who has a cat, who blogs, who lives in Portland, Oregon. But I’m saying it: I love to bake. I have come to love baking more and more as I get […]
That’s what this is. the 1000th post on this blog. I’ve been blogging since the end of 2007. I’ve written 448,889 words. Thanks for reading. Blogging is fun. And we had another milestone in our house this weekend. Here’s our guys, eating breakfast. From the beginning, we’ve just given them big
I occasionally get a little sensitive about writing this blog. I sometimes see that people find this blog by searching for my name. And I initially wonder, why would anyone search for me? People from high school? Ex boyfriends? The mob? Then secondly, I think back on all that I have written in the past […]
I have a new post up at What To Expect, about favorites. I used to have one favorite. Now I have three. It’s complicated. You can find the post here. Please go read!
So, babies. We have two of them. They have behaviors. Some of these behaviors make perfect sense. Like when Cask is insufferably miserable in the heat. The red cheeks. The sweaty hair. The incessant whining. God, this is my kid. I don’t even want people looking at me when I’m hot. Stop it! Stop looking […]
I don’t get a lot of trolls. I get maybe one or two troll comments a YEAR. So like, none, practically. And I do get trolls, they are usually drive by comments, people who find my blog randomly while searching for something. Like Mighty Putty, or Boob Fund Jars, or (almost) Failing DMV Tests, or […]
I’ve lived and worked in cities for nearly half of my life. I describe myself as an “aggressive pedestrian.” When I am going to cross the street, I make it more than evident. I perch impatiently on the curb. I glance around to make sure cars see me. The instant the little white man appears, I [...]
Me? Yeah, you. You want a piece of this? Dave and The Punk Butts ready for their album cover shot. Their latest album is “Heroic Staring Into The Distance.”
This week, we’re off to the east coast, the land of my ancestors. I haven’t been back since 2007. This time, I’m bringing a husband and two babies to meet my grandparents, who are in their 90s. My grandfather is 95. They are also meeting aunts, uncles and lots of cousins. They all have curious [...]
Have I mentioned our nanny is a photographer? Do you want to tell me to shut up already? But do you see these photos? You SEE these little faces? I’m mentioning it again because Xilia is running a special on photo shoots for the next few weeks. And I cannot recommend her enough. She is [...]
Our twin boys are nine months old. I know they are getting bigger, but I am somehow surprised whenever they achieve new milestones. Or when they learn something new. Or when their babbles start taking on a conversational articulateness. I see them getting bigger, but my inside reaction is always, “They don’t st
Need a good laugh? Here you go. I wasn’t doing anything tremendously amusing. Just making faces. For some reason right then, it was the funniest thing in the world. Thanks, kid.
Yes, again. It’s a yearly thing. It’s a tradition. Since I moved to Portland, and since Dave and I have been together, we have moved five times. This will be our sixth move. In five years. We have never renewed a lease. I realize this sounds exhausting and maybe a little silly. Isn’t moving a [...]
You know this already, right? You know it intuitively. If you put your hand on anything while on a bus, or reach out to steady yourself, you can be assured that thousands of other people have also had their hand where ever you are putting yours. And who knows what may linger on the surfaces of [...]
Did I mention that our nanny is a photographer? Did I mention that she is awesome? Through the course of the day, she sends me photos of the guys. There are times I feel like I might just burst because THE CUTENESS. All photos by Xilia. I’m telling you, seeing these little faces gets me [...]
I had been contemplating writing about parenting and judgy-ness. I have been thinking about “judgement” for a while, and the sport we make of it. It’s a national past time. Someone, somewhere, is doing something wrong. And boy, someone, somewhere else, is pissed about it. I’m no different. I have opi
Five years ago, I was new in Portland, and I met a guy for a beer. Not to sound like a ridiculous cheesy cheeseball, but I was in a new city, I had just gotten a job, I had just moved into my own apartment and it felt like the world was full of possibility. [...]
I got a job. I mean, a job away from home. I was sort of, maybe, perhaps, thinking about going back to work, but I figured it was going to take me a long time to find a job that would suit our purposes. I wanted a job that I would enjoy, otherwise it wouldn’t [...]
Ignore, if you can, my voice. This is the voice I use to talk to the babies. All day long. Every day. I imagine it will not be much longer before my voice is frozen like this and my “baby voice” becomes the only way I know how to speak. We are reading Baby Led [...]