I am in a fight for my life.  We all are actually, but some take a more phlegmatic approach – and some of us are obsessed.  It’s a curse – either way, it’s a curse. If you coast through life, you may find that you don’t finish well.  However, if you take an active, obsessive [...]

Recently my friend Brandi sent me a book.  I’ve heard of it, and I understand the basic premise, but I haven’t read it yet.  Maybe you’ve heard of it. Why Men Hate Going to Church, by David Murrow. The basic premise, as I understand it, is ”that the church caters to women, children and the elderl

“Maybe it’s not right to tell these people there is room for them in most Christian circles—because there’s not.” ~Brian McClaren Starting a church is a daunting process.  Not the least in this process is, where to start.  One could read the Bible through and through, and still not have a solid handle on

I’m not an idiot. Oh sure, you could probably find a few people who would disagree. You may disagree.  But I’m not.  Even if I never do something significant again, I have accomplished a few things in my past.  Good things – and few great things.  But maybe my time has passed.  Maybe my flame is [...

I realized something yesterday.  It was during a job interview process and the subsequent rejection that I realized something about myself.  I’m not very hungry.  What I mean by this is, I’m fairly content with the life and journey God has me living. I’ve spent a lifetime trying to attain peace and cont

Many  parents underestimate their value.  Because of their own fears, insecurities, and issues, they get wounded and hurt – then they pull away and retreat into their own little world.  The problem is, kids need you.  They absolutely need you to stand firm – no matter how hard it is, or how hurt you are. [..

I remember being 19.  It was heady.  I knew everything, had no fear, and I saw life as full of opportunity.  I was anxious to explore freedom and couldn’t wait to get away from the chains that held me back.  I actually thought I was smarter than everyone else.  I was not open to advice, and [...]

Sometimes – usually – it is outside of our control. In fact, almost everything in my life is outside of my control.  And yet, I have this incredible need to feel like I have some input.  But I don’t. My schedule, my travel, even when I am awake or asleep – all of these are [...]

This time of year we hear a lot of music that we don’t normally hear.  Some of it isn’t actually Christmas music, but we only hear it during the holiday season.  As I drove to work the other morning, a song came on the radio that stirred up those usual warm Christmastime feelings.  It’s a [...]

There are a lot of people who don’t understand why I am so honest and transparent on this blog.  Many more don’t understand why I have very few secrets.  Still others, are concerned that my thoughts, words, and emotions will be discouraging to others.  I’ve actually found the reverse to be true.  In ot

Would you like a free, or nearly free house?  Take over the payments, or buy it on Short-Sale, and it’s yours. When we were transferred from Colorado to Oregon, we put our house up for sale.  The housing Bubble was just bursting.  In order to unload it quickly, we lowered the price $5000 a week [...]

We’ve all been sick this week, but it has given me an opportunity to witness something powerful in action.  That is, our kids need AND want us. When it was my Wonderful Wife’s turn to be sick, she was holed up in the bedroom trying to sleep, recover, and chill.  The kid’s thoughts were never far [...]

I originally started this blog to autobiographically share my experiences, experimentation, and excitement at being a Dad.  Interestingly, life kicked us into the gutter and in many ways, this became my therapy – my church, if you will.  I know I lost a lot of followers as I shared my angst and anger.  I also [...]

We have an inherent need to be in community.  To share our experiences, strengths, and hope with others – this is what brings courage to our journey, and teaches us to be compassionate with others.  And yet, as imperfect beings, we struggle with these associations.  Emotions, communication breakdown, fear, pride,

Occupy the heart of your family; spend time, be an example, and have presence.                       Time: Without time, quality and quantity time, your family doesn’t know you exist. Example: Your vision, your direction, and your actions speak louder than your wo

I think my parents would be amazed to hear me say I learned something from them.  Oh sure, they taught me to make a bed, tie my shoes, and be polite – but what about the truly big things?  I actually learned a few of them.  Unfortunately, I was about 25 before they sunk in [...]

Sometimes it can be good to be the heir apparent and favored son, but often being raised in this environment can be painful.  Sure, history books are filled with stories of young men inheriting their father’s legacy and kingdom – but just as many, if not more so, were subjected to great trials and tribulation.

My Darling 6yo Daughter has been doing swimming lessons for the past three years.  Her Little Brother didn’t take formal lessons, but I was allowed to get in the water with him and we would splash around.  It’s been a good experience.  Last year they were both in classes and excelling amongst thei

My parents were victims.  My Dad shrugged it off (mostly) and moved on.  My Mom never did.  She lived a life of pain and depression, and shared her legacy of victimization. She was a dream-killer, a spoil-sport, and a pessimist.  She also had great love and in her desire to help herself, she helped

Over the course of the past month I’ve been having an interesting discussion with you, my readers, and myself.  It’s been about change, questions, the status quo, and the desire to leave well enough alone.  I’m not sure I even know how to do this. My 9th Great-Grandfather (Roger Williams) was so

After my last post, and some choice comments, I’ve been wondering why I just can’t leave well enough alone?  Why can’t I just keep my head down, mouth shut, and avoid eye contact?  To stop trying to make a difference – at this point in my life – seems like defeat. So, it got me [...]

According to the personality, temperament assessments I’ve completed, people like me like to know “why.”  Others are more “what” or “how” oriented – but we analytics what to know “why?“ Some of my earliest memories involve getting in trouble for asking this ques

My Dad is sick.  He’s dying.  And it’s hard to watch.  As far as I know he doesn’t have any fatal disease, but nonetheless, he’s dying. It shouldn’t come as a surprise – we all die… eventually.  But it’s hard to watch.  My Dad always said he’d be tough – but h

Dear Smiling Son, today is your 4th Birthday and it has been a great couple of days.  On Sunday you celebrated with your best friends.  I saw videos and photos – it looked like you all had a great time.  Yesterday, you got your big present from Mommy and me.  We gave you a red [...]

A few years ago I was burned out, tired, exhausted, and only slightly depressed.  It was not a good time.  I had given my heart and soul to my life’s mission, and now I was paying the price.  I get that, but apparently others didn’t. In the midst of that process, I grew cranky, directive, and [...]

Paramedics and EMTs were drawn to EMS for various reasons.  Obviously there is the excitement, the variety, and the opportunities to help people.  EMS workers are usually lumped in with the other helping professions: Physicians, Nurses, Firefighters, and even Police Officers.  In fact, when you talk to any of these folks

A few years back, as part of a leadership program I was involved in, I learned about two different communication styles.  One was a “Grace-Giver” and the other is a “Truth-Teller.” Not surprisingly, the majority of well liked leaders are Grace-Givers.  I’m in the Truth-Teller category

The other day we went for a great bike ride around a beautiful lake.  My Wonderful Wife was laughing out loud with joy.  It was late evening on a warm Summer day, there was a light breeze, a cover band was playing to 100s of picnickers, and we all reveled in a perfect Northwest August night! [...]

My Darling (6yo)  Daughter has been super affectionate lately.  Several events have conspired to create this I believe. First, in an attempt to save some money and time, I’ve been sleeping in my truck between shifts.  This means I am away from home for about 40 hours at a whack.  Absence makes the heart grow [...]

Our shift has barely started and we aren’t quite ready to go on the road, but dispatch calls to see if we can take a rectal bleed call just down the street.  We look at each other, nod, and take the call. We get a lot of calls for rectal bleeds, few of them are [...]